Still Faith and Precious

Asalamualaikum
Okay here we go again another nonsense topic which is 'I don't know what to write to day'
Blurgh boo such an idiot you're lacking of ideas because of staying in the house all day and night no joke I'm Patrick since the first day I arrived which was last week eh last week kut maybe lah I don't know yeah last week

And now I present to you NOTHING hahah seriously I don't know what to say now
Oh yeah I would like to write a short story but a bit lazy right now maybe later
It's about a young father Still has to take care of his one and only daughter Precious because of her wife Faith died in a car accident on her way back from work to pick up Precious from school
It's a long story argument between the two spouses and how Faith had been patience with Still that has a big ego he thinks he's smart and as a man he can do anything that he want but Still loves his wife so much it's just sometimes he can't control his temper towards Faith

I don't know it some kind of stupid short story I guess I'll cry while writing it I can feel it feel the heat the sadness the happiness that Faith going through with Still and the awaiting of Precious into their life
While her pregnancy without Still's knowing it he keep on arguing with Faith but Faith can't fight it back because she loves her husband more than she loves herself
For her Still is everything in her life
But Still still with the attitude that annoyed everyone's around them including his own mom

But after the lost of Faith Still lost his faith and his lovely wife Faith but Faith left him something precious that is Precious their beautiful and lovely daughter that has Faith's eyes and mouth
It makes Still loves Precious more than anything
Faith is gone and Still hoping that Faith will come home again to sit beside him all the time whether in hard and easy time like Faith always did before

Now I'm going to cry :(
Then
Still is still loyal waiting for his wife until his last breath
Actually Still wasn't her everything but Faith was Still's everything he just realized it after the lost of Faith
Precious is the precious thing that Still only has to patch some the missing pieces in his heart

I'm about to cry no joke
Wasalamualaikum

A perfect couple

Asalamualaikum
A very perfect couple
But already split up because of what I don't know Alex Turner and Alexa Chung

This couple oh my God seriously killing me

Are you kidding me I was jealous of their relationship
Okay first Alex Turner he's charming childish appearance that makes me keep on falling in love with him his rock star personality melting me away while watching his video clips with those messy hair

but now after the split up he changes his personality to more lively man with that Elvis Presly's hair
Still love him

Look at 'Hold on we're going home' covered by him with those dances and appearance OH LORD he's perfect but now he's with another girl I forgot what's her name hahah

For Alexa Chung she's a magnificent one with her styles as a twenty two year old young model
Seriously in love with her too now she looks more lively without Alex Turner by her side maybe I have to make her as my role model in life

She's independent friendly confident in everything her fashion boyish like small girl in a flower dress
Boyish while girly like a little kid seriously she's awesome
With that short messy hair that skinny body with short and long sleeves top yeah kidding me girl
She's beautiful a presenter model and writer
By the way she had launched a book named 'IT' it's all about her I guess and I think I have to buy it heheh
I really want that book her book's cover is simple as simple as she is this is it

She's inspiring me trust me I'm not kidding she's the only western people that I think better than others 

Of course Allah is my Lord God and Rasulallah is His messenger my prophet 

I'm a Muslim I remember that all the time :)

That's all mkbye

Wasalamualaikum

Babies

Asalamualaikum

Well well look who's here come back to write again again about life while listening to Justin Timberlake's song 'TKO' I thought he was saying 'TKL' hahah and I don't know what is 'TKO' means I just listen to the song as long as it's good to be hear

And now I'm currently in Putrajaya guess what am I doing here well I'm a nanny now taking care of Aisar one of my nephew a toddler three year old one which are love to sing to dance to talk alone to take shower by him self to sleep to eat
Of course that's all he knows as being a children hmm

Actually I don't know there's Unifi here and it's the fastest internet ever I'm glad to have Unifi in this house so I won't feeling lonely by doing nothing here
Okay after taking care of Aisar I think it's fine fo having a baby right now as a student la not for me I'm a student too but not for me to have babies with this young age maybe I won't have a baby at all who's willing to have me as a wife hahah
About him
We're friends now it's okay then and I'm okay too trying to make my self as busy as I can by playing and taking care of Aisar maybe I'll update blog regularly because I don't know what else can I do here hmm
This was me last night

Hahah and to day I'm a bit okay than last night but still have that face though 

My life had been surrounding by babies I guess I've been adapted with this surrounding Insyallah no excuse for not knowing how to take care of babies after married

Because since small Mek taught me how to take care of babies if I'm not mistaken in the early age of eight year old  yeah trust me I'm a good mother like Mek did before

Seriously I don't know why am I keep thinking about babies maybe I'm into it I love  to observe them and try to help theirs' moms to hold them in my arms but I'm afraid to have a soul in my stomach blurgh 

I don't know maybe I should stop thinking about this try to talk about something else 

That's all 

Wasalamualaikum

Awkward

Assalamualaikum

Old story let it be drafted now you have to finished it.

"Last night was my birthday on 7th November guess what guess what he took me out okay this was for the first time he asked me out yeah this was miracle baby. At first I was on the bus way back here Klang then he kept on asking "what time is it?" I was like "It's almost twelve whats wrong are you going out again tonight?" yeah he said he waited for his friend to make a call to ask him out againnnnnn. So I was just okay with it then he asked "again what time is it?" "Twelve" I anwered.

"Happy Birthday to you"
Bla bla bla he sang me the birthday song I was surprised and quiet until he finished his choir hahah
Then bla bla guess what this was for the first time I had a birthday present from a boy usually my girlfriends gave presents for me thanks guys love you guys"

Okay enough with the story line the moral of this story he loves me I thought he doesn't love me
Sobs sobs sobs I've been appreciated by him sobs sobs sobs for the first time
I was touched
Nah enough with the drama

He gave me this :)

A cute minion's cup cake that he lied to me that he loves minion like I do before my birthday 

Arigato gozaimasu Onizuka Sensei Aishiteru Sensei ;)

Okay that's it

Walaikumusalam

I changed my mind

Asalamualaikum

Don't say any word seriously I'm bored being in this room for almost two weeks I need to get out from here but actually I just went out last night accompanied my sister bought some of kitchen's stuffs but yeah it's not fair because I can't buy something that I want ceh she gave the permission to buy something I was looking for nestle nestum with oat but tesco didn't provide that drink and I was like whatttt are ya crazy or what because I really need to drink that thing yeah poor me what can I do just nodding like blurgh

By the way I was thinking about to have a spouse after finishing my second month of my degree without his agreement pfft of course he wouldn't have that feeling to have me in my life in his young age pfft again he's not ready and I thought I'm ready to take that responsibilities as wife and student at the same time but after I count think discover observe and every kind of survey asking questioning alone before I go to bed I'm not ready yet seriously I'm not!

Do you know why?

Okay first of course my future husband still a very young man just like me we're at the same age 19 are you crazy a woman 21 years old married to a guy also 21 years old we don't matured enough that time of course he wants to spend more time with his friends and family so do I "WE AS YOUNG PEOPLE PLEASE GET A LIFE ENOUGH WITH YOUR LOVE STORIES" see I'm saying it now this is for the first time I have this feeling towards my self how about towards others of course feel like to throw up
How can he take care of me I mean 'nafkah' food place to stay clothes money to buy me stuffs that I want I can't say bye bye just like that to my want to be stuffs if I have a husband and that's his responsibility to buy me all those things that I wanted?
How about transportation? Public transport til when?
Poor my guy

Second families arch this is the best part in marriage life phew if his mom okay I'm okay but it seems like Momo will not okay with it also Mom I mean Mek like she always said 'nak make belake paghe?'
Hoo no no no this is crazy his sisters brother cousins aunties uncles wan nenek papa uii scary
And me Biwi Abeju another six sisters aunties uncles what will they say about me I'll be theirs' hot topic for back biting but I'll get rewards from it blurgh
NO

Third arch this is it BABIES
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
The most scariest things in life this isn't game this is life after you had them in your life you can't give them back you work for it have fun with it so take a good care of it don't throw them like they're a piece of junk
Make love have sex that's the most happiest things to do in marriage life isn't remember that fun ain't going to be long time after you have the eyes of your marriage in your life yeah get into it take them carefully gracefully
I asked my sister how does it feel to have a baby in your stomach and how about giving birth to them
What did she answer?
"It's the most painful pain that I've ever had"
And I feel like to faint to die to fall on the ground I cried like nooooooo
She said its hard to take wudu' sleep eat too many 'alahan' can't that can't this err seriously 'mengada' and 'menyusahkan' I don't think that he can stand with my attitudes during my pregnancy see how he treats me now? Seriously he can't stand it with that 'mengada'
'sikit sikit nak muntah sikit sikit nak muntah apa awak ni'
AAaaaaaaaaaaaa I'm sorry it's soo 'menyusahkan'
Enough with babies I'm a baby too
With the breast feeding swollen breasts 'period pun aku takleh tahan' damn
Too much money to be use for raising those babies yeah nursery school food milk pampers clothes toys candies ice cream cookies chocolates that stuffs you can share with mama heheh

ENOUGH
I'm dying thinking of this things the most important is I don't think that I'm ready to have my own family with my future spouse because he also not ready yet to take those responsibilities as a young abah so chillex cool and enjoy with your single life a a don't mingle 'berdosa' hahah

So I JUST CHANGED MY MIND TO STAY SINGLE

But maybe if I have my own family I'll teach nurture them with Islam Insyaallah they will be growing up becoming good muslims and muslimahs that can help others to find the guidance the right path to Allah Ya Rab Ya Rahman Ya Rahim My Lord Allah
Amin

Walaikumusalam

You don't know me

Asalamualaikum and hye

Guess what I've just read my old writing if I'm not mistaken it were in 2011 I shocked but why my it is because I loved to curse that day month year yeah that's me I love it but now no more cursing I'm keeping away this lips from cursing anything anyone and everybody

Do you know if you keep on cursing or talk bad about others your mouth will be smelly like drain with the chemicals that can kill many hundreds thousands of people especially infant like me yeah purlease hahah
And plus when you sleep you know that kind of water that come out from your mouth while you're sleeping thing that we called as ' air liur basi ' uii yeah that water will come out easily
That's what I experienced from talking bad and cursing to others and that's why I prohibited my lips from all that kind of bad things

In the previous blog what I always talked about were love hate cursing love hate cursing sex err no sex please I mean love hate cursing cursing hate love that's it arch grow up Ipah Alhamdulillah I just grown up heheh Syukr Ya Rab Ya Allah I'm 19 almost 20
By the way this morning I woke up and brushed my teeth while I was brushing my teeth I saw one of my hair colored gold guess what of course I screamed then my sister came to me "What's wrong?"

I'm going to have grey hair that's mean I'm getting older bb bb bbut I'm 19 shh no bb bb bbut stop uttering getting older is normal either you're 19 20 21 if Allah wants you to have grey  hair on 19 so it will be you should be grateful for still having you in your body that can make you breath and continuing doing ibadah so Syukr Ya Rab Ya Allah once again for giving my life back after finishing my rest last night

Who cares about getting older you asked for it when you're small by always asking your mom
"Mek when can I be like you have my own job family house?"
This is it honey this is life blurghh

One more thing about nuffnang actually what's nuffnang I've seen that thing for many times in many blogs I keep on questioning my self what is it for we can make money from it but how I want to join it but I'm afraid that I have to pay for it maybe for fee to join it but my junior joined it maybe it's free maybe I'll join it later after this maybe

Another one more thing I have to repeat BMW for this long sem bla bla bla and my friend told me that he can't understand what am I trying to tell on my blog and twitter maybe all of my social network account because I didn't put any marks especially full stop arch you know what I really hate full stop I don't know why but I can't stand by looking at that dot pheww
What's the big deal honey just read it many times trust me you'll understand it with Allah's guidance then you'll not have to repeating the reading on my writing and texts again hahah
Sorry honey

Trust in me you'll not regret for trusting me
Walaikumusalam

Something that I missed

Dear, this is not a letter but it is also not a poem,

that is nice to be read by someone like you,

but I wrote this just for you,

I'm thinking, wondering, and it is really disturbing me.

Why cant I answer your question?

It is a simple question.

"Why do you love me?"

I'm sorry I can't tell you why, but maybe now I'm trying 

and I'll tell you why.

Why I wrote this?

If I speak you won't listen because you're mad at me.

I love you because you're everything.

I mean it's because it's you.

That's why I love you.

I don't need something from you, I just need you. 

You're the one who I craved for.

That's why I love you.

Dear, I know it's all because of me. You looked at me in different way.

My fault, my fault, it's my fault but for me,

you're still the same man, man that  I know.

The one who loved, cared, miss and loyal towards me.

You're my man, you didn't change and you can't change 

my love towards you, it will not happens.

It's my fault you're looking at me in different way.

My fault, my lust, my desire, my choice, my fault.

I'm sorry I know you're bored listening to my apology.

I don't know why I'm keep on begging you, begging you to love someone

who didn't deserve you. Yes I'm a beggar in your life.

I'm thirst, your caring really make me thirsty.

Now, I realize lust is nothing.

Your taught me lust is a disastrous, lust finished, finished everything.

Our relationship and me.

Dear, tie me again. I'm your kite.

Please guide me again, guide me with your love, your care.

Hold me in your heart again and keep on saying that you'll never ever 

going to leave me alone in this cruel world which is full with crocodile's lust.

I'm scared myself, you're scaring me with your heart.

The heart that I don't know whether it'll beat for me again or not.

Maybe if it's beat, it'll beat for other person that you're willing to beat it.

I don't mind, as long as you'll always be by my side.

Yes, I'm crazy. My craziness kills us both.

Sympathy in your heart, just give it to me,

I'm willing to accept anything from you.

"When it comes from you, it's the best for me."

That's what you used to tell me.

I love that words come from your mouth.

In other words, I love everything that's comes from you.

With love Aby :)

Just thought of it

Asalamualaikum

You dont know what Ive been through since I was a little kid til now it was something that I cant tell about I just to keep it and that kind of thing I mean things haunting me til now Im afraid and scared of everything especially losing people that I loved this happened when I was in standard six I was twelve years old at that time dad left us because of heart attack

Many people said that heart attack is one of rich peoples disease its nonsense doesnt make any sense at all Im sorry because my laptops keyboard is not feeling well right now its been a long time ago I always forgot to send her to the hospital but as long as its still can be tap and the alphabets appear on the screen Im not going to send her anywhere

I was too close with dad until everywhere he went I was going to follow him from behind even though he was going out with his friends still I was there to follow him I dont know why but I was his baby girl and what I noticed about this he never mad at me as long as it was not haram thing to do yeah he was a daddy the best daddy Ive ever had and no more another daddy please except papa in law kekeke

I hate to talk about daddy its not that I hate him but later Ill start to dream about him every time I speak about him yes he will come into my dream not tonight tomorrow usually Ill dream about him after talking about him scary not scary but not cool at all so I dont know maybe its because Im a kind of person excessively thinking about something until it appears in my dream

Thats why I hate to have problems especially with people because they make me cant fall asleep *sigh* thats the worst feeling ever having problems with someone friends family boyfriend man its totally killing me so o Lord Allah keep me away from talking bad about others so I dont have to feel guilty in my heart before I go to bed on how to apologize on someone that Ive talked bad but I feel ashamed of them please Allah clear my heart from all those kind of things

But  missing someone cant make me fall asleep
You know what I mean :)

Wasalamualaikum

I'm okay

I'M JUST FEELING TIRED BUT I WANT TO WRITE GRRRRR..

NEVER MIND GOT SO MANY THINGS TO THINK.

HMMM..

This is me when I'm tired *sigh

O' Allah loves me

Assalamualaikum

I'm here trying to say that today is the last day for this year I mean before asr we're going to read the end of the year dua and then during maghrib we're going to read the beginning of the year dua
Meanwhile

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim..

O' our Lord Allah please forgive me forgive us for our sins that we had done
O' our Lord Allah please forgive both of our parents sins that they had done before
O' our Lord Allah gives us strength faith and success in our life
O' our Lord Allah keep us away from maksiah and fornication
PANJANG KAN LAH JODOH AKU DENGAN NYA YA ALLAH
Jadikanlah aku miliknya dan jadikanlah dia milikku

Amin amin amin Ya Rab Bal A'lamin..

Arifah Zakaria this is not about fasting and you don't have to wait for Ramadhan to change yourself from bad to good and from good to better and best. If you want to change you have to start  it from now InsyaAllah I'll try my best to

IT IS NOT ABOUT FASTING

Covering my aurah properly no titspemes hijabster like Mohon Clash always mentioned before stop cursing or saying any bad words remember Allah is always with you 

If you want to be nice He is always there to help you if you're trying to be bad he's also always be there to guide you to the right path :)

Thats all

Wasalamualaikum

Dua for the end and beginning of the year

Doa Akhir Tahun:

Doa Akhir Tahun dibaca 3 kali pada akhir waktu Asar atau sebelum masuk waktu Maghrib pada akhir bulan Zulhijjah.

Dengan izin Allah, sesiapa yang membaca doa ini akan mendapat Perlindungan Allah SWT dari fitnah dan tipu daya syaitan serta mendapat setahun keampunan dosa yang lalu.

Maksudnya:

Allah SWT berselawat ke atas penghulu kami Muhammad SAW, ahli keluarga dan sahabat-sahabat baginda dan kesejahteraan ke atas mereka.

Wahai Tuhan, apa yang telah aku lakukan dalam tahun ini daripada perkara-perkara yang Engkau tegah daripada aku melakukannya dan aku belum bertaubat daripadanya. Sedangkan Engkau tidak redha dan tidak melupakannya. Dan aku telah melakukannya di dalam keadaan di mana Engkau berupaya untuk menghukumku, tetapi Engkau mengilhamkanku dengan taubat selepas keberanianku melakukan dosa-dosa itu semuanya. Sesungguhnya aku memohon keampunanMu, maka ampunilah aku. Dan tidaklah aku melakukan yang demikian daripada apa yang Engkau redhainya dan Engkau menjanjikanku dengan pahala atas yang sedemikian itu. Maka aku memohon kepadaMu.

Wahai Tuhan! Wahai yang Maha Pemurah! Wahai Yang Maha Agung dan wahai Yang Maha Mulia agar Engkau menerima taubat itu dariku dan janganlah Engkau menghampakan harapanku kepadaMu Wahai Yang Maha Pemurah. Dan Allah berselawat ke atas penghulu kami Muhammad, ke atas ahli keluarga dan sahabat-sahabatnya dan mengurniakan kesejahteraan ke atas mereka.

Doa Awal Tahun:

Doa Awal Tahun dibaca 3 kali selepas maghrib pada malam 1 Muharram 1434H (Hari Rabu malam Khamis).

Barangsiapa membaca doa ini sebanyak 3 kali selepas solat rowatib ba’diyyah Maghrib pada malam tanggal 1 Muharram, Allah akan memerintahkan 2 malaikat untuk melindunginya daripada fitnah dan tipu daya syaitan selama setahun yang mendatang.

Maksudnya:

Allah SWT berselawat ke atas penghulu kami Muhammad SAW, ahli keluarga dan sahabat-sahabat baginda dan kesejahteraan ke atas mereka.

Wahai Tuhan, Engkaulah yang kekal abadi, yang qadim. yang awal dan ke atas kelebihanMu yang besar dan kemurahanMu yang melimpah dan ini adalah tahun baru yang telah muncul di hadapan kami. Kami memohon pemeliharaan dariMu di sepanjang tahun ini dari syaitan dan pembantu-pembantunya dan tentera-tenteranya dan juga pertolongan terhadap diri yang diperintahkan melakukan kejahatan dan usaha yang mendekatkanku kepadaMu Wahai Tuhan Yang Maha Agung dan Maha Mulia.

Wahai Tuhan Yang Maha pengasih dari mereka yang mengasihi dan Allah berselawat ke atas penghulu kami Muhammad. Nabi yang ummi dan ke atas ahli keluarga dan sahabat-sahabatnya dan kesejahteraan ke atas mereka.

A good student ( used to be )

At first everything must be perfect clean tidy and 'RAPI'.
But after a few weeks it was like errrr

Found this in my old note book what did I wrote on it this is it nigger.

A6.601  ( HOME SWEET HOME )

1. Tolong kunci pintu bilik ( bawak ke mana mana sahaja) - na ah I just left it like that ya aw wanna take those thang just take it I don't give a damn nigger please

2. Tolong tutup lampu dan kipas ( berdosa ) - ya aw not gonna say something like that god dammit if you turn it off hell yes hot sweating like a hot babe tonight 

3. Nak tido kunci bilik - yeah this is a must nigger there were too many hoes out there tryin to steal at night they think they were god damn cat woman 

4. Dekat drying yard pakai hanger - hell no never but yeah sometimes

5. Pakai tudung kat drying yard ( sebab orang luar nampak ) - nigger please no one loves blacktivity like us

6. Jangan mandi lama lama ( kongsi ) - na ah that was my favorite cubical I fix the shower so I can use how many hours that I love

7. Pakai dress code - whaaaaaaat mama didn't teach me to wear something like ya aw wear na ah naw nigger

8. Tepati masa - bhahahahahahahahaha I'm a mr president how come I do have to come earlier then they do naww

9. Tolong flush lepas guna toilet - damn nigger you're dirtier than miley cyrus twerking dammit

10. Simpan barang mandi kat utilitis - god dammit who stole my shampoo I'll shoot ya aw with my gun I'm gonna shoot ya if I catch ya tryin to steal ma thang again

11. 7 malam tutup langsir (sebab nampak ) - na ah never nigger

Resit SAHAJA

Assalamualaikum I think I miss you my blog I really wanted to write more and more but yeah I don't have my own personal laptop or pc so it's hard for me to take some time to use others gadgets to write on you.

First of all ain't finishing from cfs yet because I have to resit BMW's paper what is that err 'Basic Research Methodology of Report  Writing' isn't? It is maybe sorry I don't know the real name of this subject and yeah I have to resit it because I failed on the final paper poor me. What should I do I ask many people about this some of em told me to repeat it some just resit so I chose to resit so during the semester break I can study for degree I mean the languages like Arabic English and Mandarin? Duh nonsense.

Feel like to learn French but we'll see about this later.

Oh yeah MUET i almost forgot about MUET dammit I already forgot about it.
What if I settle the resit of BMW first and then we'll talk about and focus on MUET okay. Just resit stop thinking about other things now you just have to study serves you Ipah others struggling for it before the final and they're enjoying their life at home right now meanwhile you have to study it again at home.

Like Mek said there must be hikmah later and this is the lesson for me who is afraid of studying before last minute now I know that I have to change this bad habit "Studying last minute will make you regret for a long time and it gives you effect on your life" Dammit again.

Just fine now now don't feel like you're a loser you're just fine it's just you're the one who had been lazy and then you failed and resit it and yeah hoping that it won't happens again in the future. Think about your next step "DEGREE" harder than foundation dammit now now just keep calm and love Allah and Mek.
Hoping that I'll pass this resit matter then I can focus on MUET to DEGREE.